2018 Movie Pre-Review

Every year is a big year, so what’s big about this year. There wasn’t much to discuss in January, so I’m moving forward to February…

February

Annihiliation – Having read the series of which this is the first book, I know the weirdness we’re in store for. And I hope the film adapts it properly.

Black Panther – Another chance for the MCU to drop the ball. But they won’t.

Fifty Shades Freed – I hated the first one so much, I didn’t even watch the second. No chance on the third.

Game Night – This one looks hilarious.

Peter Rabbit – I really want to take my daughter to this one. For her. Really.

March

A Wrinkle in Time – I was a huge fan of the book when I was a kid, but the trailer doesn’t look anything like the story I remember. Maybe it will be awesome? More likely not.

Hurricane Heist – This is the kind of stupid action film I love.

Pacific Rim: Uprising – Most people liked the original more than I did. I can’t imagine this is better.

Ready Player One – I really liked the book, but this feels like it will run a course similar to Jurassic Park: disappointing on first viewing, followed by “yeah, that was pretty good” later on.

Red Sparrow – This one is just funny because it sounds like a Black Widow movie without Black Widow.

The Death of Stalin – There are many reasons I want to see this, but seeing Michael Palin on screen is at the top of the list.

Tomb Raider – Sure. Whatever. Reboot. I have zero emotional investment in the IP, but I do like Vikander.

April

Rampage – Hey, what if the 90s Godzilla was less serious?

May

Avengers: Infinity War – I’m honestly worried that there are too many characters. Still, this will be awesome.

Borg/McEnroe – John McEnroe may be the part that Shia Leboeuf was born to play.

Deadpool 2 – Remember when the Kick-Ass sequel was super-disappointing. That’s what I’m worried about here.

Solo: A Star Wars Story – I think might be fun. Or a waste of time. More likely fun.

June

Incredibles 2 – Well, I’ve only been waiting forever for this one.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom – I really enjoyed Jurassic World. This seems to be of a piece with it, so I’m looking forward. (Plus, Goldblum!)

July

Ant-Man and the Wasp – I would be worried that they overstayed their welcome, but they’ve got the same director back. I’m hopeful this will be even better.

Mission: Impossible – Fallout – These films just get better and better. I don’t understand how it’s possible, but I am pleased. (Plus, Monaghan!)

Skyscraper – Didn’t Dwayne Johnson star in an improbable action film three months ago? He did? I guess he’s due.

The First Purge – Okay, I think I have to actually catch up on this series now.

August

Scarface – I guess the DePalma version was a remake, too. So, have fun.

The Meg – I’ve been waiting for a prehistoric shark film. Soon, the wait will be over. Also, it will probably suck.

September

Robin Hood – I guess the Ridley Scott version (and the Kevin Reynolds version (and the Mel Brooks version (and the Terry Gilliam version (and the Richard Lester version…))) is a remake, too. So, have fun.

The Predator – I really enjoyed the 2010 Predators, but I have faith that Shane Black can do something awesome here.

October

Venom – Okay, I guess, if you feel the extreme need to have this movie, whatever.

November

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald – I really liked the first FB film, but mostly because of the promise it showed for future installments. Don’t drop the ball, J. K.!

X-Men: Dark Phoenix – I’m one of the three people on the planet who actually liked X-Men: The Last Stand. So I have no inherent interest in seeing this story “done right”. But the new batch of X-people have been largely effective. (Apocalypse was a dip in quality.) Hopefully this will be a reasonable send-off before the MCU reboots mutants from the ground up.

December

Aquaman – Jason Momoa was one of the brighter spots in Justice League, so I am not immediately giving up on this.

Bohemian Rhapsody – This Freddie Mercury biopic looks very interesting.

Bumblebee – Sigh.

Holmes and Watson – Honestly, I couldn’t care less about Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly. I am intrigued, however, by Hugh Laurie as Mycroft and Ralph Fiennes as Moriarity.

Mary Poppins Returns – I have zero investment in the IP, but I love Lin-Manuel Miranda.

Mortal Engines – It wants to be the next Lord of the Rings. However, it look like the next Maze Runner.

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